Hot Pink Pistol

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Hopey's Big Adventure

Pee Wee’s Big Adventure has always been one of my favorite movies and this past week I feel like my life has been a direct parallel to the movie. Only instead of finding a bike I am trying to find my way to Puerto Vallarta Mexico.

My boyfriend Noah and I had an awesome trip to Mexico planned for one of his best friend's weddings. We set off bright and early with our swimsuits underneath our clothes. My passport book had expired about 4 months ago so when I went to renew it I saw there a cheaper option that was a passport card. Me being the cheap ass I am I opted for the card. The passport card has now become Francis Buxton the bully that wants to buy Pee Wee’s bike.

So the big day arrives on Tuesday and we arrive at the airport at 6:45am to hop on the plane. We go to check our bags and the woman asks for our passports. Noah promptly whips out his passport book and I my card. She takes one look at my card, giggles a bit and then informs me I can’t FLY with the passport card. It was almost as if she laughed and said,

“There’s no basement in the Alamo silly”.

This is when it starts going to shit. I begged and pleaded, I even cried but it did no good. They also informed me the days of going to Houston and getting a same or next day passport were over. I then told Noah to get on the plane but he wouldn’t budge. Without hesitation he looked at me and said fuck it, we will drive.

We were on the road by 7:30am never once looking at Google maps or consulting with anyone that might have some insight of what we were getting ourselves into. It was as if Noah has a 1000 Chris Farley’s size jackets and he was gonna throw all of them over a giant puddle so I could walk over it. We were going to Mexico together hell or high water damn it!

I do love me some Noah but we don’t always see eye to eye on music. It was at about 5 hours into our road trip when he was singing the Old 97’s at the top of his lungs ( and I actually like his voice) I felt like Pee Wee when he was on the train with the homeless man singing old favorites and eventually had to jump from the train.
Luckily I found a Specials greatest hits and a Shins CD and suddenly his singing was much more tolerable.

After about 10 hours of driving we made it to the Mexican border. They promptly asked Noah to get out of the car and proceeded to ask him lots of questions in Spanish. I wasn’t exactly sure what they were saying but I contemplated saying out of the corner of my mouth, “I say you just let him go”. I have always heard to horror stories of Border towns so I was pretty sure my final moments of life were going to be me doing a goofy dance in platforms while humming Tequila through my tears.

Eventually we managed to pass through and instead of giving us a motorcycle to drive through a billboard they gave us a map to drive through lots of mountains. It’s starting to get dark and let’s just say there were no lights. I swear the road signs through these mountains were worse and curlier were worse than when Pee Wee has picked up the hitchhiker and is driving in the dark. If only we had some night vision goggles.

We assumed it was maybe another 4 or 5 hour drive before we got to out suite ass hotel room with a seaside view according to the map we received at the border.

So we drive and we drive and we drive and at every stop asking if anyone spoke English or had any idea of how much further Puerto Vallarta would be. We got to Chihuahua city when we found someone who spoke enough English to tell us it was not exactly a 4 or 5 or drive but another 20 fucking hours! In complete and utter defeat we found the nicest hotel we could and stayed the night. I awake to Noah snoring and almost believing it was all a bad dream. I tiptoe to the window and pull back the curtains only to find a huge brick wall six feet away, no seaside view. It was at this point I can’t keep it all together and just break the hell down. I am used to letting myself down but I hate more than anything letting others down. Noah works very hard and never gets time off and I know that if it weren’t for me he would be basking in the sun. He should have been putting a lime in a Corona that shaded him just right or something close to their advertisements. Instead he is driving me back to Austin.

Luckily we found Noah another flight to Puerto Vallarta at 7am from Dallas.

I wish at this point I could say I made it to Mexico/got my bike back but I can’t. I have always said the part I hate most about traveling is the getting there and getting back. This was a trip that consisted of getting there and getting back but no actual vacation.

We may not have made it to Mexico or on the silver screen but Noah and I are already planning another trip.

I do find some solace in that Noah actually made it there and is having fun. I just wish I was riding on his handlebars.

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Apartment Therapy

Check out my big sisters (Jennifer Perkins of Naughty Secretary Club) home in Apartment Therapy! If you look a little closer you will see some of my collages and dead rapper paintings!

Monday, October 27, 2008

Howdy Folks!
If you happen to be in Philadelphia this evening check out my art work at the "Inaugural Show" at the T&P Fine Art gallery featuring art by not only me but Shepard Fairey, Andrew Jeffery Wright and Richard Pose to name a few! Tonight is the opening but the show will be up until the end of November.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Hey there party people in the house. Did you know I currently have a "dead rapper" themed window display at the Beauty Bar in Austin? Did you know you can get a head start and buy those bad boys before they are even out of their glittery glass prison? Well you can cause mama is stacking em deep selling em cheap on Etsy! If you saw something in the Beauty Bar window that you cant live without but its not on Etsy just let me know and I will cut you a mean deal!
If dead rappers aren't your thing check out the
Long Branch Inn bar in Austin which currently houses my Chola Girl series and ghettoed up taxidermy collection!
Hope Perkins

Monday, August 04, 2008

Monday, March 03, 2008

New Goodies!


So have been wondering what your favorite one trick pony has been up to? Well I have been painting my ass off and I have proof!

I have brand new painted purses at Naughty Secretary Club! Treat your lip gloss and tampon's with a little respect and carry them in a Hot Pink Pistol hand painted purse. Did we mention Naughty Secretary Club is having a special "Wish you were here sale" for SXSW. Through March 18th enter SXSW in the coupon/voucher field as you check out and get 15% off your entire order!

Got a bare wall in your place? I have about 15 new Dead Rapper paintings at Austin's Cheapo Discs located at 914 N. Lamar Austin, TX. They will be up for the next month so all you out of towners coming in for SXSW be sure to stop in and check my art and cheap Cd's!

Speaking of SXSW..... Want to be the only person in the world who owns a hot pink leather dress with a glittery portrait of Dr. Rockso and Murderface on it? Was that a yes? Well then you my friend are in luck! I will have my one of a kind painted dresses and purses for sale at a couple different places this year..................

March 13-16th 12pm-10 Austin Craft Mafia has a booth at the Hotel San Jose/Jo's coffee side walk sale on Congress Ave.................

On Sat March 15th I will have dresses and purses at the Bust Magazine Party located at Habana on 6th street. There will be free drinks, bands, Elijah Wood (Frodo) and crafts from 1-6pm so ya just cant go wrong.

Check out at Austin's latest rad site @ Lush Life Austin Also if you have not added them as your friend on myspace yet be sure to!

Ok I am sure you stopped reading a long time ago.


Hope Perkins

Monday, July 09, 2007

Save the Date 7-21-07!!!!

Howdy Folks,

So is having their one year anniversary party and as you may or may not know Method Hair also doubles as a gallery and is currently housing my art. Yes that means its a 2 for one'r AND I have all brand spanking new Dead Rappers for your viewing pleasure. Besides tubular art, Method Hair will have food, desserts, music and adult beverages for you to enjoy. Go on and kill those irritating metaphoric birds and enjoy an art opening and the one year anniversary party with just one stone. So save the date (Sat. July 21, 2007) and look for more details in the coming days. I look forward to seeing you!

Hope Anna Perkins and Method Hair